I had this dream middle of the night before last. During the wee hours of the morning, in a half-asleep, half-awake state, I replayed (yes, REPLAYED) the entire dream just so I don't forget it and can write about it to Boo and Yaada Yaada (YY) But the entire following day I totally forgot that I had even dreamt anything. Then, last night, in the same semi-conscious state, I remembered not remembering the dream and AGAIN replayed the whole thing in my mind, forcing myself to remember all the details! So here goes...
Boo and YY live abroad somewhere. I live in Mumbai. And I am on my way to join them. I go to the airport. It's a complete indoor setting. Following a red carpet walk, there's a Sufi temple (This is nothing... wait for more!) entrance next door and there are women in burkhas and men in the male equivalent of burkhas (whatever they are called) going in. There's a Yasser Arafat-like-dressed-man at the entrance smoking on a hookah and spreading out fragrant smoke, welcoming everyone. The next door is a glass door and leads to the airport. There's lots of cartoon characters a-la-disneyland welcoming everyone. I walk in empty-handed, because my sister has promised to pack all my stuff and bring it to the airport. Now this is pretty wierd (really? Just this part?) because I am coming from home and my sister is away at work and somehow she's the one doing the packing and bringing the luggage over! Anyways... I see my very close friend there who is also doing international travel. She has a 9-month old son with her and her mom has come to drop them off. And in my wierdoland, this friend wants to go home and drop off her mom, who has actually come to see her off... Go figure! So she asks me if I want to accompany them. I agree (my flight leaves in an hour, by the way!) and in the next scene we're all travelling in a cab, about half-way from the airport and suddenly, my brain alarm goes off, I do some quick mental math (hear hear) and figure out that I'll actually miss my flight as Bangalore traffic (Note : Bangalore as against Mumbai, where I'm supposed to be living!) is really bad that time of the day. So I apologise to my friend and WALK BACK to the airport. Same doors, same burkhas and same cartoon characters. This time they shake hands with me, gift me lots of balloons and streamers and wish me a safe trip. I walk in to find my sister and niece frantically searching for me. (Guess this was pre-cell phone era) And get this... I'm mad at her because all she has for me are two books to read during the flight!!! I ask her about the promised packed luggage and she gives me a wierd look and says "I thought you were coming from home. Why didn't you get it yourself?"
Cut to the next scene... somehow magically I am at my destination. Wearing some really cool clothes that belong to either Boo or YY. (Now, this is nothing new, as I've spent practically my childhood years well into teenage wearing their hand-me-downs. But, interestingly, I can fit into neither of their clothes at the moment!) So, coming back to the dream... it's a really beautiful, picturesque locale and I'm sitting under a HUGE lovely tree with some guy, who is supposed to be YY's friend (Pretty good-looking one, actually! Wink Wink!) with 2 bikes parked next to us.
And........... very very VERY unfortunately, Joy chose this moment to bring me back into reality with her characteristic tossing and turning! So... that's about how it all ended! Damn... HOW I wanted to get to know the guy better! And God found this really wierd way of punishing me by cutting it off right there! It's like "You have a baby on your hands woman! Stop dreaming and get back to work!" Ah Bah!!!
Friday, February 22, 2008
Thursday, February 21, 2008
Kiss me baby one more time!
The first few times, I DID notice it, but looking at Joy opening her mouth in a wide "O" and licking the cheek of the person carrying her, I assumed she was hungry! But when she kept repeating it, on and on, even after a full feed, that's when it hit me! My sweetie pie... with all her drool and everything... was kissing me for so many days and I didn't even realize it! Speaks volumes about my intelligence, but Joy being the idol of patience that she is, kept doing it again and again until her mother's pea-sized brain could finally comprehend it!
Whoopieeeeeeeee......... My baby has learnt to kiss! And I cant get enough of it!
Whoopieeeeeeeee......... My baby has learnt to kiss! And I cant get enough of it!
Life is sick these days...
Yep! Joy is sick. I am sick. My mom is sick. Sick Sick Sick!
Joy constantly has nose blocks, but this is her worst ever! She was completely breathing through her mouth. Nursing and sleeping for her has been nightmarish. The doctor prescribed a decongestant and she's slightly better since. But the girl is an absolute doll I tell you! So patient and so adjustable and smart enough to think of alternate ways of sleeping and nursing... I've had tears in my eyes more than once, and not just because of my cold!
I've caught the worst cold, cough and sore throat ever! So I'm both sick AND dumb!. (Like I needed a reason to be dumb) It's sign language all the way! Plus I've hurt myself somehow, sometime, in a very sensitive part of my body and so nursing the squirming, stuffed-nose Joy has been fist-clenching to say the least. But the best part is, she somehow KNOWS that I'm hurting. And in spite of all her troubles, every so often she looks up at me with this kind of cutesie enquiring look that speaks a thousand words... and the moment I smile at her, she smiles back, relieved, kicks her legs in happiness (ouch!) and resumes her job! Sigh...
My mom is down with fever, cold, cough, sore throat... all the works! Looks like bugs have hit the household with a vengeance. With an extra bug added to each older generation. Luckily it's not the other way round... thank God for small mercies! Guess the change of weather is to blame. (In Bangalore, we blame everything on the "weather-change". Any other reason is dismissed with a wave, however viable it may be. It's like PMS!)
Talking about the household... we were hit with an extreme high voltage surge a couple of days back. We lost the TV, water pump, UPS and the washing machine. The TV was on, but the rest were all switched off and their only misfortune was that they were plugged in at the time of the surge! It took 2 days for the pump to get replaced. One can imagine how we survived an almost waterless 2 days! The washing machine luckily is fairly new and so is covered by warranty. It should be up and running in another couple of days. The UPS is still awaiting inspection. The TV is lost to oblivion and is last on the priority list. I discovered yesterday that my cell phone charger is gone too! I was trying not to imagine the horror of living without it for a while and luckily my niece came to the rescue and loaned me her old one. What we did before the advent of internet and cell phones I just can't recollect, try as I might!
Soooooooo... that's pretty much the current state of affairs! With saturday being Joy's next immunisation day, nothing great to look forward to either! And what with my sister, younger niece and sister-in-law all being sick in different parts of the continent, all I can hope for is, the family that falls sick together, stays together!
Joy constantly has nose blocks, but this is her worst ever! She was completely breathing through her mouth. Nursing and sleeping for her has been nightmarish. The doctor prescribed a decongestant and she's slightly better since. But the girl is an absolute doll I tell you! So patient and so adjustable and smart enough to think of alternate ways of sleeping and nursing... I've had tears in my eyes more than once, and not just because of my cold!
I've caught the worst cold, cough and sore throat ever! So I'm both sick AND dumb!. (Like I needed a reason to be dumb) It's sign language all the way! Plus I've hurt myself somehow, sometime, in a very sensitive part of my body and so nursing the squirming, stuffed-nose Joy has been fist-clenching to say the least. But the best part is, she somehow KNOWS that I'm hurting. And in spite of all her troubles, every so often she looks up at me with this kind of cutesie enquiring look that speaks a thousand words... and the moment I smile at her, she smiles back, relieved, kicks her legs in happiness (ouch!) and resumes her job! Sigh...
My mom is down with fever, cold, cough, sore throat... all the works! Looks like bugs have hit the household with a vengeance. With an extra bug added to each older generation. Luckily it's not the other way round... thank God for small mercies! Guess the change of weather is to blame. (In Bangalore, we blame everything on the "weather-change". Any other reason is dismissed with a wave, however viable it may be. It's like PMS!)
Talking about the household... we were hit with an extreme high voltage surge a couple of days back. We lost the TV, water pump, UPS and the washing machine. The TV was on, but the rest were all switched off and their only misfortune was that they were plugged in at the time of the surge! It took 2 days for the pump to get replaced. One can imagine how we survived an almost waterless 2 days! The washing machine luckily is fairly new and so is covered by warranty. It should be up and running in another couple of days. The UPS is still awaiting inspection. The TV is lost to oblivion and is last on the priority list. I discovered yesterday that my cell phone charger is gone too! I was trying not to imagine the horror of living without it for a while and luckily my niece came to the rescue and loaned me her old one. What we did before the advent of internet and cell phones I just can't recollect, try as I might!
Soooooooo... that's pretty much the current state of affairs! With saturday being Joy's next immunisation day, nothing great to look forward to either! And what with my sister, younger niece and sister-in-law all being sick in different parts of the continent, all I can hope for is, the family that falls sick together, stays together!
Saturday, February 9, 2008
Drumroll...
...for my baby's first roll!
At last, after so many many attempts, frustration, repeat attempts, tears, etc. etc. (all on her left side) she finally rolled over (on her right side) in her birthday suit!!
At last, after so many many attempts, frustration, repeat attempts, tears, etc. etc. (all on her left side) she finally rolled over (on her right side) in her birthday suit!!
The Daffodil Principle
This came by e-mail from someone I know. It must've been forwarded and re-forwarded a million times. I don't even know if it's true. But, it's the first thing I read this morning and somehow it made me sit up and think a little! And the picture just made the muggy, cloudy, drizzly Bangalore morning a little brighter! So, here it is...
(For some reason, the fonts and colors seem to have a mind of their own and I'm not able to control them!! Please bear with the inconvenience!)
Several times my daughter had telephoned to say, "Mother, you must come to see the daffodils before they are over." I wanted to go, but it was a two-hour drive from Laguna to Lake Arrowhead "I will come next Tuesday", I promised a little reluctantly on her third call.
Next Tuesday dawned cold and rainy. Still, I had promised, and reluctantly I drove there. When I finally walked into Carolyn's house I was welcomed by the joyful sounds of happy children. I delightedly hugged and greeted my grandchildren.
"Forget the daffodils, Carolyn! The road is invisible in these clouds and fog, and there is nothing in the world except you and these children that I want to see badly enough to drive another inch!"
My daughter smiled calmly and said, "We drive in this all the time, Mother." "Well, you won't get me back on the road until it clears, and then I'm heading for home!" I assured her.
"But first we're going to see the daffodils. It's just a few blocks," Carolyn said. "I'll drive. I'm used to this."
"Carolyn," I said sternly, "please turn around." "It's all right, Mother, I promise. You will never forgive yourself if you miss this experience."
After about twenty minutes, we turned onto a small gravel road and I saw a small church. On the far side of the church, I saw a hand lettered sign with an arrow that read, " Daffodil Garden ." We got out of the car, each took a child's hand, and I followed Carolyn down the path. Then, as we turned a corner, I looked up and gasped. Before me lay the most glorious sight.
(For some reason, the fonts and colors seem to have a mind of their own and I'm not able to control them!! Please bear with the inconvenience!)
Several times my daughter had telephoned to say, "Mother, you must come to see the daffodils before they are over." I wanted to go, but it was a two-hour drive from Laguna to Lake Arrowhead "I will come next Tuesday", I promised a little reluctantly on her third call.
Next Tuesday dawned cold and rainy. Still, I had promised, and reluctantly I drove there. When I finally walked into Carolyn's house I was welcomed by the joyful sounds of happy children. I delightedly hugged and greeted my grandchildren.
"Forget the daffodils, Carolyn! The road is invisible in these clouds and fog, and there is nothing in the world except you and these children that I want to see badly enough to drive another inch!"
My daughter smiled calmly and said, "We drive in this all the time, Mother." "Well, you won't get me back on the road until it clears, and then I'm heading for home!" I assured her.
"But first we're going to see the daffodils. It's just a few blocks," Carolyn said. "I'll drive. I'm used to this."
"Carolyn," I said sternly, "please turn around." "It's all right, Mother, I promise. You will never forgive yourself if you miss this experience."
After about twenty minutes, we turned onto a small gravel road and I saw a small church. On the far side of the church, I saw a hand lettered sign with an arrow that read, " Daffodil Garden ." We got out of the car, each took a child's hand, and I followed Carolyn down the path. Then, as we turned a corner, I looked up and gasped. Before me lay the most glorious sight.
It looked as though someone had taken a great vat of gold and poured it over the mountain peak and its surrounding slopes. There were five acres of flowers.
"Who did this?" I asked Carolyn. "Just one woman," Carolyn answered. "She lives on the property. That's her home." Carolyn pointed to a well-kept A-frame house, small and modestly sitting in the midst of all that glory. We walked up to the house.
On the patio, we saw a poster. "Answers to the Questions I Know You Are Asking", was the headline. The first answer was a simple one. "50,000 bulbs," it read. The second answer was, "One at a time, by one woman. Two hands, two feet, and one brain." The third answer was, "Began in 1958."
For me, that moment was a life-changing experience. I thought of this woman whom I had never met, who, more than forty years before, had begun, one bulb at a time, to bring her vision of beauty and joy to an obscure mountaintop. Planting one bulb at a time, year after year, this unknown woman had forever changed the world in which she lived. One day at a time, she had created something of extraordinary magnificence, beauty, and inspiration. The principle her daffodil garden taught is one of the greatest principles of celebration.
That is, learning to move toward our goals and desires one step at a time--often just one step at time--and learning to love the doing, learning to use the accumulation of time. When we multiply tiny pieces of time with small increments of daily effort, we too will find we can accomplish magnificent things.
"It makes me sad in a way," I admitted to Carolyn. "What might I have accomplished if I had thought of a wonderful goal thirty-five or forty years ago and had worked away at it 'one bulb at a time' through all those years? Just think what I might have been able to achieve!"
My daughter summed up the message of the day in her usual direct way. "Start tomorrow," she said.
She was right. It's so pointless to think of the lost hours of yesterdays. The way to make learning a lesson of celebration instead of a cause for regret is to only ask, "How can I put this to use today?"
Use the Daffodil Principle. Stop waiting ....
Until your car or home is paid off
Until your kids leave the house
Until you finish school
Until you organize the garage
Until you clean off your desk
Until you lose 10 lbs.
Until you get married
Until you have kids
Until the kids go to school
Until you retire
Until summer, spring, winter, or fall;
There is no better time than right now to be happy.
Wishing you a beautiful, Daffodil day!
Friday, February 8, 2008
At random...
It's been very busy lately... Anything I do somehow seems to need more than 24 hours. And I hardly do anything! How is that? There's a household full of people to keep Joy fully occupied. (Sorry, it's actually the other way round! Anyways, point being, everyone is happily busy!) So I have all the time in the world to do what I want to do. And what did I do?
I watched Taare Zameen Par. In about 10 installments! And yes, with a pirated DVD! Hey, they probably make these for sleep-deprived, outing-deprived new moms like me, alright! So stop judging me! The movie itself was amazing. Now, I'm not one for crying at movies. However touching and moving they may be, the most they can do is sort of lubricate my dry eyes! (I hasten to add, I'm not heartless... this is just the way I react to movies. A movie IS after all, a movie!) And inspite of me being me, this one really had an effect. I was left totally speechless and this is one of the very few movies that actually sort of jerked me up. A teensy warning here... this may not be so good for new moms! There was many a scene (especially the ones where the mom replays videos of the boy during his infancy, his first day at school, etc.) where I found I was actually picturising myself and Joy in similar situations. *Shudder Shudder*
Then there was this project I had started during pregnancy and had to follow-up on. I started picking up the threads recently... and am still in that process! Not even close to finishing it! Guess I'm taking the client for granted!! (Note: Taking the client for GRANTED and not for a RIDE! It hasn't reached that stage yet!)
I've been spending considerable amount of time in front of the mirror... and I can't even start to recognize myself! There's flab everywhere, the newly acquired paunch seems here to stay and my entire body seems totally disproportionate! I still fit mostly only into my pregnancy clothes and I'm going about narrating my sob story to all and sundry! Finally I decided to something about it, now that the 3-month recovery period is over and was planning to enroll myself in the gym that's right next door. Wanted to start from Feb 1st but one thing led to another and then one of my friends frightened me a little about gymming so early post-surgery. So that plan was shown the door! Have started going for walks... remains to be seen how long before that too becomes history!
Joy has entered the "extreme playfulness" and also the "over-working the vocal chords" phase. Which has led her to almost forget that she has a stomach and that she needs to fill it up now and then! Never ever did I imagine the first 3 months that I will be faced with a situation like this! So now I'm having a pretty tough time trying to get her to nurse, and it's proving a lot more difficult and time-consuming than I'm comfortable with!
And of course, it's been a while since I updated my blog! I received comments from so many bloggers... and never paid back the courtesy of replying to them or visiting their blogs! The former is being worked on as I type and the latter I hope, will soon follow, Joy-permitting! (In the past few days I've written almost a million different posts. In my head! And didn't get a chance to get to the comp even!)
So that's whats been happening in the recent past... more posts to come I hope... until then... signing off!
I watched Taare Zameen Par. In about 10 installments! And yes, with a pirated DVD! Hey, they probably make these for sleep-deprived, outing-deprived new moms like me, alright! So stop judging me! The movie itself was amazing. Now, I'm not one for crying at movies. However touching and moving they may be, the most they can do is sort of lubricate my dry eyes! (I hasten to add, I'm not heartless... this is just the way I react to movies. A movie IS after all, a movie!) And inspite of me being me, this one really had an effect. I was left totally speechless and this is one of the very few movies that actually sort of jerked me up. A teensy warning here... this may not be so good for new moms! There was many a scene (especially the ones where the mom replays videos of the boy during his infancy, his first day at school, etc.) where I found I was actually picturising myself and Joy in similar situations. *Shudder Shudder*
Then there was this project I had started during pregnancy and had to follow-up on. I started picking up the threads recently... and am still in that process! Not even close to finishing it! Guess I'm taking the client for granted!! (Note: Taking the client for GRANTED and not for a RIDE! It hasn't reached that stage yet!)
I've been spending considerable amount of time in front of the mirror... and I can't even start to recognize myself! There's flab everywhere, the newly acquired paunch seems here to stay and my entire body seems totally disproportionate! I still fit mostly only into my pregnancy clothes and I'm going about narrating my sob story to all and sundry! Finally I decided to something about it, now that the 3-month recovery period is over and was planning to enroll myself in the gym that's right next door. Wanted to start from Feb 1st but one thing led to another and then one of my friends frightened me a little about gymming so early post-surgery. So that plan was shown the door! Have started going for walks... remains to be seen how long before that too becomes history!
Joy has entered the "extreme playfulness" and also the "over-working the vocal chords" phase. Which has led her to almost forget that she has a stomach and that she needs to fill it up now and then! Never ever did I imagine the first 3 months that I will be faced with a situation like this! So now I'm having a pretty tough time trying to get her to nurse, and it's proving a lot more difficult and time-consuming than I'm comfortable with!
And of course, it's been a while since I updated my blog! I received comments from so many bloggers... and never paid back the courtesy of replying to them or visiting their blogs! The former is being worked on as I type and the latter I hope, will soon follow, Joy-permitting! (In the past few days I've written almost a million different posts. In my head! And didn't get a chance to get to the comp even!)
So that's whats been happening in the recent past... more posts to come I hope... until then... signing off!
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