F O U R

As month four ends and the fifth one dawns both Pu and Joy are growing and discovering. Joy now joins her hands together and takes them above her her head whenever anyone says "Govinda Govinda", as my mother has trained her to do. She has stopped rolling over for the most part, as she's absolutely uncomfortable on her tummy. She loves to sit and is forever asking to sit on the swing, bouncer, stroller, car seat, or best of all, anyone's lap! Stranger anxiety is at it's peak and woe becomes anyone who side tracks her refusal and tries to carry her! She's babbling like a brook and all sorts of vowels and consonants are being introduced to a perfectly devoted audience everyday! Toys are getting kicked and thrown about like nobody's business. There's bucket loads of drool...on her fists, ours, her toys... just about everywhere. I have started bathing her and surprisingly, except for a couple of incidents, there hasn't been much vocal support from her! At least, she doesn't howl the place down, so I assume she's either resigned herself to it, or is actually starting to enjoy it. The "Brrrrr factor" (the one where she purpose-fully draws the ever-flowing drool into her mouth and then sprays out loudly) is being practiced in all it's glory! About a 2 km radius around her can be termed as the wet zone. And as always, she continues to be very patient and understanding, taking everything and everyone in her stride!

JOY in four words...

Cranky - With a capital C. The first half of the month she was ok. The second half has seen the brunt of it! She doesn't nurse, doesn't sleep, doesn't play. All we can get out of her is a polite courteous smile now and then and that's about it. She was clearly in pain and we couldn't figure out why. Two pediatricians, ("She's a perfectly healthy baby"... Duh! Like I didn't know that) many phone calls and free advices later (none of which helped) I read my baby bible (Thanks Boo! That's the only thing that pulled us out of our misery!) and finally found out the little one must be having teething pain! Apparently the teeth sprout only after the seventh month or so, but some poor babies (aka my sweet little formerly-good-tempered-Joy) face the pain a good one or two months early on. The symptoms are just way too clear to dismiss. Sooooooo... Joy still suffers, but now I know why AND I know it's temporary. So one out of two is less cranky!

Clingy - A by-product of the crankiness, arises clinginess. I can use terms like "velcro" or "fevicol" to describe her... It's mommy time all the way! The grand dad gets a cursory smile and that's it. The grand mom, thank God, is still held in familiar circles, but Mommy rules big time! As long as I'm with her and touching her, she's a dear. A couple of minutes of my disappearance and slowly the crankiness begins. Anyhoooooo... as my niece warned me, I have decided to enjoy this time and then try not to complain when Mommy is shown the door and Daddy starts to rule!

CUDDLY - The epitome of it! She loves cuddling and she loves even more to be cuddled! Wet, sloppy kisses abound the household and needless to say, we're all loving it!

Patient - In spite of all the Cs that I've come up with earlier, this trait deserves a special mention! I'm proud to say I'm learning from her (already!) and trying to cope up with her troubles as much as she is. The "Brrr factor" is being used as a defence mechanism. So nowadays, if she's unable to cope with anything, she does that instead of losing her temper and crying and I get the message. Poor little darling...

PU in four words...

Sleep-deprived - Again, by-product of Joy's restlessness and crankiness. Her daytime sleep has all but disappeared. Nights are typically restless and see a lot of tossing, turning and bouts of crying. There's no choice but to nurse her, (the only time when she actually allows me to nurse her these days) although sometimes, just comforting her and hugging or putting an arm around her works. We're basically taking each day/night at a time! I'm not a daytime sleeper at all by any terms. I'm still waiting for my first uninterrupted-sleep night!

Helpless - Watching Joy struggle for so long hasn't been easy. Although the mind repeats that this is nothing big, everyone goes through this, there's a lot more to come, and so on, the heart is absolutely wrenched. Nights are the worst. The poor thing is so disturbed and looks so full of pain, I'm at a total loss for words or actions. The book says the pain will continue till the damn tooth sprouts, that will take a couple of months at least, and I'm not sure I can continue watching this until then. I have never felt this helpless in my life. Ever. The poor baby clinging to me as if I can make it all go away doesn't make it any easy either. Since she's not able to nurse, I've resorted to feeding her expressed milk. Pushing that down her throat is another whole story by itself. If ever I got my hands on a magic wand, I would just swish it and make it all go away. Until then, all I can do is pray.

Anxious - Joy and me move to my place next month. My in-laws will be there for a while but after that it's just Hubby, me and Joy. Although I'm excited by the prospect of getting back to MY place and living life MY way and having my darling Hubby around me all the time (Ah... how we cheat ourselves!), the thought of flying the nest (this didn't seem to bother me in the least, up until now!) and losing the security of having my unconditionally loving parents at my beck and call, seems nightmarish to say the least. I'm hoping for the best. I'm not sure if I'm prepared for the worst. But the silver lining is that they're just a phone call and about an hour and half (on a good Bangalore traffic day) away!

Depressed - Just a wee bit! Much as I tried to live in denial, I finally admit it! I am never one who dwells in self-pity or gets depressed or upset at things... however big they may be. 'Take life as it comes' is pretty much my motto. But a few days back something happened, the dam burst, I cried a little bit, talked about it to Hubby (Not sure if that sorted out things... but whatever!) and I think I'm over it now. I think. I most certainly hope so... this one bout caught me by surprise and I didn't like one bit of it. Anyways, it's back to enjoying life again! At least for the moment.

P.S. Yes, I know this post is long over-due. It was done in many installments. I never edit or read through any of my posts, so I hope there's enough coherence and continuity to make sense!